Pia's Diary

Bitches???

2005-04-15T15:00:00.000+08:00

i beg to disgree?! we're not bitches, we just love to bitch around -

...sometimes?!

Thank you...

2005-04-10T09:50:00.000+08:00

"Somewhere between the procrastination...and the homework...and the incessant forwards...and the friendships...and the calls to each other complaining about crushes...somewhere between the phone calls to old friends...and the "I miss you's" and the "I love you's"...and the "What are we doing tonight's?"...and somewhere between all of the changing, growing...somewhere between the classes...and the cutting classes...and the studying for exams...and the pretending to study for exams...and the downright NOT studying for exams...I forgot...

I forgot what school is all about...I forgot what it meant to cry...I forgot that pretending to be happy doesn't make you happy...and that pretending to be smart doesn't make you smart...I forgot that you can't just forget the past in fear of the future...I forgot that you can't control falling in love...and that you can't make yourself fall in love...I learned...

I learned that I can love...I learned that it's okay to mess up...and that it's okay to ask for help...and it's okay to feel like chicken shit...I learned it's okay to complain and whine to all your friends for a whole day...I learned that sometimes the things you want most you just can't have...I learned that the greatest thing about school isn't the dances or the drinking or the hook-ups...it's the friendships, which means taking chances...I learned that sometimes the things we want to forget are the things which we most need to talk about...I learned that letters from friends are the most important things...and that sending cards to your friends makes you feel better...But basically, I just learned that my friends...both old and new...are the most important people to me in the world...and that without them, I wouldn't be who I am today..."

*****
thank you for four memorable years [and I'm glad to know that things didn't end at graduation]

Friends of the Road

2005-04-09T12:02:00.000+08:00

Dale was crazy. That's why I liked him. He could always, I mean always, make me laugh. Whether we were hanging out at the mall, playing pick-up basketball in a park, sitting in Sunday school, or giving serious speeches in Mr. Olson's civics class, a mere glance from Dale could slay me. On more than one occasion I was sent out of the room because I couldn't regain my composure.

Dale and I had more in common than hijinks and humor, however; we had countless conversations, at all hours of the day and night, about everything from pop music to current events to the meaning of life. We also had soul-searching talks about our fears, our futures, our relationships. This was no light-weight relationship. We saw each other through the strum and strang of adolescence. Like two war veterans, we helped each other survive. At journey's end, however, the friendship faded. I haven't seen Dale, my high-school confidant, since the day we graduated.

How does a once-bosom buddy wind up a distant memory? And is a friendship that fades away necessarily a bad thing? I don't think so. There is a line in James Michener's novel, Centennial, that speaks to how even good friendships can be fleeting: ". . . he wished he could ride forever with these men . . . but it could not be. Trails end, and companies of men fall apart."

Some friendships are meant to be transitory. Like cowboys who ride herd together for miles, sharing both dusty perils and round-the-campfire coffee, we all have friendships that come to their natural end. Not because of discontent or lack of interest. Simply because the road has run out. We've hit the end of the trail together and it's time to move on to other things, other companies of men.

Understand, these are not failed friendships. Not at all. They are friendships of the road, equally intense, equally necessary, equally worth cultivating and treasuring as the long-lasting versions. We couldn't survive without them. They get us through a particular stretch of road, and for that we can be grateful. Sure, I regret not staying in touch with Dale-photos of him still crack me up-and other friends who've shared a portion of my path. I even fantasize about reviving or repairing some bygone relationships. But with most long-lost friends I know I'd have little in common now. Our bond lies in the past, irretrievable except for the memories. The composer Beethoven must have understood this when he said, "Friends are not only together when they are side by side, even one who is far away is still in our thoughts." The friends we meet along life's road make the journey joyful.

*****
from an email received some years back

Yummy Treat...

2005-04-07T16:26:00.000+08:00

treating myself after a hard half-day's work...

Books, books, and more books!

2005-04-07T14:01:00.000+08:00

books to read...

Where Am I Now?

2005-04-07T12:37:00.000+08:00

one year in Trend...one month in the team...200+ VRs...